Merideth's 2nd note to self - ah ha!

* tantrum-ing 9 month old. (just b/c there is now a 35 inch distance between us doesn't mean i am gone forever.)

* bickering 4 year olds. (can't your almonds be called both "almonds" and "nuts?" can't we all just get along?)

* dog peeing on kitchen floor. (again? really?)

* taxes due. (oh, how it pains me to write that check!)

* husband absent. (new oooold truck bought with dishwasher-might-soon-die fund requires that many hours of love and attention?)

. . . so merideth eats.

18th Note to Self - weigh-in

Down another 2 1/2! :) that's 12 1/2 total. Kinda excited. So excited I went clothes shopping. HAHAHaaa Yeah, good times. Note to the note to self, only go shopping when you are in a very good mood, or you'll want to kill people. But, I was in a good mood, and I did find a few things, so no prison time for me.

Even still, I need to be careful about the next time I go shopping. I remember getting very discouraged in the past by trying on and trying on and trying on and not having anything fit. (and that dresser room mirrors were went sent by the Devil!) I need to remember that this is going to be a long process. What's more important than fitting into smaller clothes, is being and feeling healthy! If I do that everything else will fall into place.

So be careful with expectations, self. Be aware of falling into traps that will take you off track.

me

17th Note to Self - thirsty

Heard from a very reliable source, the fourth grader.

When you feel hungry, you are actually thirsty, so drink water.
When you feel thirsty, you are actually dehydrated, so drink LOTS of water.

me

Anon's First Note to Self - tips

My grandmother always told me to wait 10 minutes if I wanted to eat something 'bad'. Her theory was the urge would pass in that time, and if it didn't, then you deserved to eat it. Eat it, enjoy it, and move on.


Great tip! My grandmother always said if you eat something over the sink it doesn't count. Not really as helpful, huh?! I like this one, and will for sure be trying it out. ~michelle

16th Note to Self - chugging along

I'm getting used to not be so full I have to hunt down a rubber band and do the ole Unbutton-the-pants-and-connect-with-a-stretchy trick made famous by pregnant ladies WHO HAVE AN EXCUSE to use such a trick. I'm eating more slowly, drinking water between each bite, and overall not acting crazy about my food. It's such a relief to take things slowly and not act like someone else is going to steal my meal and keep it for themselves. I mean really, who's going to steal carrot sticks, grapes and veggie soup?? the 100 calorie kettle corn does get some longing glances, but I dare someone to take even one of those deliciously sweetened kernels from the fat girl. Go ahead, make my day, bitches.

All these smaller meals are, as promised by skinny switch, keeping my blood sugars even so I never crash. I am loving how I feel being on an even keel all the time.

so good job, self.

me

Merideth's First note to self - self regulating

you know, in high school, if i overindulged over the holidays or whatever, and my jeans felt a little tight, i would almost subconsciously make little adjustments for the next couple of days and be right back on track, sizewise. it was just a natural thing to be ... i started to type "thin," but that's not right ... fit? normal? not the least bit chunky?

so, i'm thinkin' my first step needs to be analyzing what has stopped me from self-regulating? oprah? dr. phil? please feel free to contact me if you've got some insight...

idea!

This may go over like a lead brick, but Merideth's post got me to thinking. What if you want to do something like this yourself, but don't really want a new blog?

Email me at notetoself@papertherapy.com (or post in comments) with your own "note to self" and I'll post a thread about it. I'll label with your name so your thoughts are easy to find. If a few of us do it we all could get some good thoughts to help us deal.

I dunno, just a thought. Might be fun.

me

15th note to self - lbs

Down 3, 2 weeks ago
then down 2 last week.

makes a total of 10 so far. go you :)

me

what I'm doing

a'ight Merideth, Here goes.

I'm basically doing my own version of the "diet" at www.skinnyswitchsecret.com it's this site that I found of some infomercial while laying awake one night. Your general calorie counting system. Only it's kinda not. At least not for me.

You see, I've got a wealth of knowledge about food and portion sizes and all that crap from my time with Weight Watchers FOREVER ago. It's all still up there (which I find pretty amazing as nothing else really is) So when this skinny switch advertisement came on it just struck something within me.

I was ready.

When you are ready, it's not so much what you follow, or change, but that you are finally ready to make those changes.

Like with any other diet plan, it can't be a diet if you want to remain successful, forever. Having done this already (15 years ago) I did have some knowledge about myself. Over the last decade and a half I have been paying attention to my body and mind, even if I haven't done a damn thing about it. with my new found readiness I'm implemented some of the life lessons I've learned so far.

This time I'm focusing on what DOESN'T work for me. How my brain ticks and what I do to, inadvertently, set myself up for failure. Now that I'm figuring those ticks out I'm finding it easier to avoid them.

I'm talking all sorts of thing here. But mainly repetitions things. thing that I'll have to do forever if I want to be a healthy person. Or a person who actually wants some part of forever.

Like:
Food choices. I'm not limiting myself to a standard "eat this every day" meal plan. I've done that and once I get burnt out (and I always do) I don't know what to eat. So I'm finding a variety of things and mixing them up, so when something doesn't' taste good anymore I have other things to fold in the mix.

or:
expectations. I'm not telling myself that "once I'm thin I'll be happy with myself" or other self talk sentences that aren't true. Once I get thin, I'll be thin. I'm already happy - just fat. My happiness doesn't go hand in hand with my weight - NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANT TO CONVINCE MYSELF IT DOES. I will NOT be happy if I only get thin. This type of self talk is defeating to me because once I get thin I will still be the same self doubting, nervous wreck person I've always been. those are other issues altogether. Granted, I'm working on the right now as well, but they aren't dependant on my weight and I can't allow myself to think it is.

and:
experiments. I'm trying new foods. foods I've told myself for years I don't like. Some I still don't. But many, I do like. That's been one of the coolest things so far. Being semi-adventurous about food and enjoying it. I think that will help me be successful in the long run.

and finally - timing. I have to convince myself this is going to take a long time. and that I'm not going to do it all in one day. Or one year. I'm treating it just an alcoholic treats his disease. One day at a time. this is an addiction for me, I'm treating it as such.

so what am I doing? really, now that I really think about it. I'm 12 stepping.

If you are ready to give something a try I would recommend the skinny switch secret site. It's not as "eat right for 2 days then anything you want the 3rd" as they claim. But it is common sense, good eating. what skinny switch does is allow you a treat every third day. This is something I love, because I really CAN eat spot on for 2 days, then allow myself something special the 3rd.

I'm going to post something else right now too. Something that might be fun to team up on this blog. work together to have our own little cheering section, if you will.

Thanks for the question. we'll be talking again soon, I'm thinking :)
Michelle