what I'm doing

a'ight Merideth, Here goes.

I'm basically doing my own version of the "diet" at www.skinnyswitchsecret.com it's this site that I found of some infomercial while laying awake one night. Your general calorie counting system. Only it's kinda not. At least not for me.

You see, I've got a wealth of knowledge about food and portion sizes and all that crap from my time with Weight Watchers FOREVER ago. It's all still up there (which I find pretty amazing as nothing else really is) So when this skinny switch advertisement came on it just struck something within me.

I was ready.

When you are ready, it's not so much what you follow, or change, but that you are finally ready to make those changes.

Like with any other diet plan, it can't be a diet if you want to remain successful, forever. Having done this already (15 years ago) I did have some knowledge about myself. Over the last decade and a half I have been paying attention to my body and mind, even if I haven't done a damn thing about it. with my new found readiness I'm implemented some of the life lessons I've learned so far.

This time I'm focusing on what DOESN'T work for me. How my brain ticks and what I do to, inadvertently, set myself up for failure. Now that I'm figuring those ticks out I'm finding it easier to avoid them.

I'm talking all sorts of thing here. But mainly repetitions things. thing that I'll have to do forever if I want to be a healthy person. Or a person who actually wants some part of forever.

Like:
Food choices. I'm not limiting myself to a standard "eat this every day" meal plan. I've done that and once I get burnt out (and I always do) I don't know what to eat. So I'm finding a variety of things and mixing them up, so when something doesn't' taste good anymore I have other things to fold in the mix.

or:
expectations. I'm not telling myself that "once I'm thin I'll be happy with myself" or other self talk sentences that aren't true. Once I get thin, I'll be thin. I'm already happy - just fat. My happiness doesn't go hand in hand with my weight - NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANT TO CONVINCE MYSELF IT DOES. I will NOT be happy if I only get thin. This type of self talk is defeating to me because once I get thin I will still be the same self doubting, nervous wreck person I've always been. those are other issues altogether. Granted, I'm working on the right now as well, but they aren't dependant on my weight and I can't allow myself to think it is.

and:
experiments. I'm trying new foods. foods I've told myself for years I don't like. Some I still don't. But many, I do like. That's been one of the coolest things so far. Being semi-adventurous about food and enjoying it. I think that will help me be successful in the long run.

and finally - timing. I have to convince myself this is going to take a long time. and that I'm not going to do it all in one day. Or one year. I'm treating it just an alcoholic treats his disease. One day at a time. this is an addiction for me, I'm treating it as such.

so what am I doing? really, now that I really think about it. I'm 12 stepping.

If you are ready to give something a try I would recommend the skinny switch secret site. It's not as "eat right for 2 days then anything you want the 3rd" as they claim. But it is common sense, good eating. what skinny switch does is allow you a treat every third day. This is something I love, because I really CAN eat spot on for 2 days, then allow myself something special the 3rd.

I'm going to post something else right now too. Something that might be fun to team up on this blog. work together to have our own little cheering section, if you will.

Thanks for the question. we'll be talking again soon, I'm thinking :)
Michelle